Women’s Issues

Dealing With A Shattered Heart After Miscarriage

By |July 31st, 2024|Couples Counseling, Featured, Grief Counseling, Individual Counseling, Women’s Issues|

Loss comes to us in different ways. One of the most devastating ways to experience loss is when it’s through a miscarriage. The promise of a new life that doesn’t come to full flower can leave one feeling confused, angry, guilty, and uncertain about the future. Understanding what happened can be a step toward finding healing and wholeness after miscarriage. Making sense of a miscarriage A miscarriage is the spontaneous loss of a fetus before reaching the twentieth week of the pregnancy. No matter the circumstances, it’s emotionally devastating to lose a child. You may or may not have known that you were pregnant, but the miscarriage comes as a surprise. Miscarriages happen due to various reasons. It’s important to remember that most miscarriages aren’t caused by anything the mother, or her partner did or didn’t do. Miscarriages happen most often because of genetic abnormalities such as having too many or too few chromosomes which prevent the normal development of the baby. Other potential but less common causes include hormonal imbalances such as insufficient progesterone; uterine or cervical problems; immunological factors which include autoimmune disorders and other issues with the mother’s immune system; bacterial or viral infections; and lifestyle factors such as excessive use of alcohol or drugs as well as smoking. Additionally, there is an increased risk of miscarriage for women over thirty-five years of age, and environmental factors such as exposure to toxins, radiation, or certain chemicals can also contribute to a miscarriage. Lastly, in some cases, the cause of miscarriage may not be identified. Whatever the potential cause, if you’ve experienced a miscarriage, it’s essential to seek medical care and counseling to address any emotional or physical concerns. Finding healing after miscarriage Having a miscarriage doesn’t prevent you from being able to have a baby in [...]

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Living a Godly Life as a Single Mother

By |July 5th, 2024|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Women’s Issues|

Living a godly life as a single mother can be difficult. You may feel lonely, defeated, unsure of what to do or how to accomplish something. You can feel that things are unfair and become sad or angry. All of these are valid emotions that single mothers feel. Single mothers experience a day-to-day life of having to be mother and father, the one who makes all of the decisions and who does all of the work. Decision fatigue can quickly take over – a phenomenon (though not a diagnosable medical condition) where the more decisions a person makes throughout the day, the more physically, mentally, and emotionally depleted they become. This can lead to stress and an inability to think clearly. Add to this a child or children who need you to help them and it creates a mixed bag of emotional responses such as becoming irritated, run-down, tired, overwhelmed, guilt, a sense of worthlessness, etc. God and the single mother This is where God comes into the picture in more ways than one for single moms. God sees the struggles that single mothers have. He wants to be there for us, but our Father only comes in where He is invited, He does not impose Himself on us. Having a strong relationship and just as important, a life, that reflects living in God’s will as a single mother will bring Him closer to you. You cannot expect God to help out with the day-to-day things if you are living a life of sin. What does that mean exactly? For example when you date, date with a pure intention. Date to find a godly man who will love and respect you and your children, do not date just because you are lonely. Look for men in places where a [...]

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Unchained: Breaking Free from the Prison of Toxic Shame

By |June 13th, 2024|Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues, Personal Development, Women’s Issues|

Shame is one of the most toxic mental and emotional states that we as humans can encounter. It may be no surprise why the enemy uses this against God’s people to persuade us into believing less than what God says. It differs from the guilt that provokes remorse when we do wrong. Shame seeks to imprint itself on our identity, thus evoking a sense of being inherently wrong or bad. As a virulent enemy, shame damages our self-perception, and destroys like the enemy who seeks to do the same (John 10:10). As an inside enemy, shame operates from our memory, to trap us and tether us to past trauma. It is subversive, captivating our thoughts and negatively rewiring our self-perception. It commandeers present choices and behaviors, halting progress toward the manifestations of God’s dream and our destiny. Shame collaborates with fear and other uncomfortable feelings to poison our patterns (in belief and behavior), infecting us with self-doubt. The weight of shame imprisons us in shadows, where we remain hidden and hurt. How God helps us break free from toxic shame In this manner, shame denies the Holy Spirit an opportunity to draw goodness out of us, though our gifts long to break through and showcase the light and splendor of a great God. We often pay more attention to its voice than the Lord who comes to comfort and counsel. The Holy Spirit will invite and encourage us, but He won’t overstep if we won’t allow God’s Truth to permeate our thoughts and inform our actions. Although it seems that the enemy screams, vying for our attention, we have a choice where to direct and harness focus. Too often, we entertain the distractions, negative thoughts, and limiting beliefs that persuade us of shame’s power instead of the authority that [...]

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What Depression Feels Like: How to Help a Loved One

By |June 12th, 2024|Depression, Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues, Women’s Issues|

If someone were to ask you to describe the colors you see when you look at a variegated rose, would you be able to do it justice? Or if someone wanted to know what the burger you’re eating tastes like, could you convey the sensations, textures, and flavors in a way they’d get? In both cases, you could do a fair job of communicating what you’re experiencing, but it’s fairly difficult to express certain experiences such as depression through words. This is one of the difficulties that a person going through depression experiences. It can be difficult to make sense of what is happening to you when you’re going through it, much less to describe your experience to others. However, understanding the experience of a loved one who is struggling with depression is key to supporting them. Understanding and describing depression When a loved one has depression, they are struggling with a mood disorder that affects how they feel, think, and act. Various possible forces interact to bring on depression, and these include genetic vulnerability, flawed mood regulation by the brain, and experiencing stressful life events such as bereavement, job loss, or the failure of a significant relationship. It affects a person’s ability to perform day-to-day tasks. It can be difficult to describe what depression feels like. From the outside looking in, some of the ways to discern depression include: Seeing a loved one's sleeping patterns affected, with them sleeping too little or too much. Changes in appetite such as eating way more or less than usual. Frequent fatigue. Expressing feelings of guilt, hopelessness, and worthlessness. Expressing suicidal thoughts and attempting suicide. The person experiencing depression might describe their experience of depression in this way, but there are other ways they may do so. Each person’s symptoms of depression [...]

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How to Reduce Anxiety: Lifestyle Changes to Improve How You Feel

By |May 14th, 2024|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues, Women’s Issues|

Chronic anxiety can create physical and emotional issues if not controlled. But events, tragedies, worries, and loss are a part of life. You cannot shield yourself from everything that feels uncomfortable or stressful, but you can lessen the effects. You need to know how to reduce anxiety for the rest of your life. How to reduce anxiety with lifestyle changes High blood pressure, high cholesterol, heart disease, type 2 diabetes, and obesity can develop over time from chronic anxiety. Although you can learn more about how to stop a panic attack and lower stress levels in just minutes, the best way to alleviate anxiety is to make lifestyle changes. Lifestyle changes mean analyzing and revamping your habits. Bad habits can worsen anxiety and stress. For example, your nervous system reacts to substances such as caffeine, sugar, medications, and illegal drugs. After consuming these substances, you might feel jittery or sluggish and experience inflammation and rapid heart rate. If you suffer from chronic anxiety, your anxiety levels will rise dramatically when compounded with these substances. Knowing how to reduce anxiety starts with changing your habits. Prioritize exercise Daily exercise is a lifestyle change that can immediately affect your stress. Exercise is the first step in reducing anxiety. When you work out, your cardiovascular system works harder to pump blood and oxygen to your lungs and heart. The body releases endorphins that give you a sense of well-being and happiness. Exercise boosts your confidence and self-esteem. If your anxiety is behind your high blood pressure, you might notice that your systolic and diastolic numbers drop, and your resting heart rate decreases a few hours after exercising. Exercise is one of those tasks you must do every day in some form to reap the daily benefits. Try various workouts throughout the week, [...]

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How to Recognize Early Warning Signs of Mental Illness

By |November 24th, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues, Personal Development, Women’s Issues|

If you have ever wondered if you or someone you know may have a mental disorder, this article on the warning signs of mental illness could be for you. Mental illness is a broad term that refers to a wide range of mental health conditions such as anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, or addiction that affect your mood and the way you think, feel, and act. They can be a source of intense distress that has a negative impact on every area of your life, including your ability to perform daily chores or take care of your needs. Mental illnesses rarely appear out of the blue. The early signs are not always easy to identify, however, unless you know what to look for. Symptoms can vary by person, depending on the type of disorder, and sometimes manifest as physical issues such as palpitations, shortness of breath, digestive problems, headaches, and other unexplained aches and pains. Common warning signs of mental illness. Typically, one of the first warning signs of mental illness in someone is just a general feeling that something seems off or out of character. If two or more of these other symptoms are also present and have lasted for over two weeks, that is a red flag that should not be ignored. Confused thinking. Trouble concentrating or remembering things. Feeling sad or down. Intense fear or anxiety. Easily irritated. Anger that feels out of control. Loss of emotional regulation. Dramatic mood swings and shifts in feelings from highs to lows. Increased sensitivity to sights, sounds, smells, or touch. Feeling hopeless or overwhelmed. Withdrawing from friends and loved ones. Inability to complete tasks. Loss of interest in hobbies and activities once enjoyed. Sudden drop in performance at work or school. Difficulty performing familiar tasks. Sudden changes in basic habits [...]

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Single Mom Help: Biblical Reminders for Single Parenting

By |October 24th, 2023|Family Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Women’s Issues|

Single motherhood can be one of the loneliest and most overlooked experiences any woman can face. Whether she is widowed, divorced, or has never been married, a woman who is parenting alone faces an array of challenges that a married parent does not. Although single parenting is much more common than it used to be, it often carries a stigma, including in the church. No matter how someone became a single mother, they are worthy of love, inclusion, and friendship. If you know someone in this situation, you may wonder how you can offer a single mom help and support. If you are a single mom, or you know you may become one, you might feel overwhelmed daily by your many responsibilities. Or you might crave a listening ear for all the burdens you carry alone. Christian counseling and help with parenting and loneliness support is available for single moms. Biblical reminders for single parenting. Discouragement and burnout can accompany all parents in their daily lives, but especially those who are raising children alone. God’s promises in Scripture provide comfort and reassurance that no matter what we are facing, we don’t have to walk through it alone. So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.  –  Isaiah 41:10, NIV This passage reminds us that when we feel alone, God is still with us. He gives comfort through his presence and helps us through his supernatural strength. He promises to uphold us, which means giving consistent support and help. Fear often creeps up when we lack companionship and support. The Lord reassures us that no matter how we feel, we do not need to [...]

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Functioning Depression: What Does it Mean When Depression Lingers

By |October 19th, 2023|Depression, Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues, Women’s Issues|

There are many misnomers around depression. One is that it is just sadness. Another is that it is rooted in a negative experience – a break-up, job loss, or something else. People think you can power your way through depression or just look on the bright side and things will be better. But as anyone who lives with this pervasive disease can tell you, none of those above statements are true. There is such as thing as functioning depression. Depression is not just a sad day. It is not being down because the weather is bad, or it was a hard day at work. It is not feeling glum because your team isn’t doing well or missing your youngest who just went off to college. This can be sadness, grief, or disappointment. It lasts for a day or two and then you can function normally and not be consumed by whatever got you down. Depression is more than sadness or disappointment. It is, at its core, a feeling of emptiness. It’s a lack of motivation. It can even lead to a sense of hopelessness and an inclination that all we are is a burden. Anyone can get hit with a season of depression. Normally these last anywhere from six to eight months and can be treated with medication, therapy, exercise, and other healthy activities. But what if despondency lingers? What if seasons come and go, winter fades to summer and back again, and the lack of motivation, inability to concentrate, low self-esteem, and loss of interest in what you used to love - lingers? What if even after medication, trying to exercise, eating better, and going to counseling, each day still feels like a grind you are trying to survive with your brain in concrete? What if doing what [...]

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Codependency in Friendships: Knowing When Things Go Wrong Between Friends

By |September 20th, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues, Relationship Issues, Women’s Issues|

Having a best friend for life can be a blessing. That blessing, however, is if the friendship is a healthy one. At times, an unhealthy dynamic of codependency  friendships is mistaken for committed care for one another. Knowing the difference between the two can make all the difference. What’s at the heart of codependency in friendships All good relationships have at their heart the mutual care and concern that ought to mark interactions between people. When it comes to codependent relationships, whether between friends, a parent and child, or between lovers, what’s gone wrong is the breakdown of healthy boundaries. For a relationship to function properly, a distinction needs to be maintained between the people in it so that their distinct needs are met. A good boundary allows us to separate our own needs and feelings from those of others. Boundaries help us define ourselves personally, helping us to thrive as individuals. A lack of poor boundaries leaves people enmeshed with one another. There is a loss of individuality, and with that is the reality that one or both sets of needs aren’t being met. That can be detrimental to emotional and physical health, leading to burnout, among other possibilities. Are you in a codependent friendship? Codependent friendships may look like a deep, rich connection from one vantage point. Upon closer inspection, what’s happening is not healthy for either party in the relationship. Both parties will likely lose their sense of identity the longer the dynamic continues. Some signs of a codependent friendship are: You feel threatened when the other person gets close to other people. Jealousy is common in codependent relationships. Often, other friends are cut off, leading to greater reliance on the friendship for emotional support. One of you is always in need of rescue by the [...]

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