Perhaps one of the hardest things we have to cope with while we are dealing with grief is the fact that life just carries on. It’s jarring to feel depressed, emotionally fragile, and even unstable while still having to perform ordinary, everyday tasks.

Grief is often a lonely process; you feel as if no one sees you, understands you, or cares to know what you are feeling. Sometimes, it just helps to know that your experience is ‘normal’ and that everyone else goes through the same thing when they are grieving.

A Quest for Closure

One of the fundamental aspects of grief is that you are learning to adapt to a new normal. This could mean adjusting to life without your spouse or another significant loved one who was part of your daily routine. You may feel like there is an empty, cold space where they used to be, and that is something that you won’t adjust to quickly. It feels like it would betray their memory to move on.

You might be grieving an opportunity that never happened. For many people, this looks like an empty nursery space in a house for a baby that never arrived. How does one simply move on from that? What does moving on even look like? When you have begun structuring your life and adapting your routine to prepare for someone or something new that doesn’t arrive, where do you go from there?

A big aspect of grief is having to deal with these unanswered questions and lingering tension. We all long for closure, but in grief, we don’t easily find it. It’s like having an open wound that never truly heals, and all we can do is dress it and make sure it doesn’t become infected.

Grief and Daily Life

Many people become stuck in grief because they don’t want to move on. It’s as if they could stay a little longer with the memory of their loved one or sit in the feelings of “what could have been.” In this sense, dealing with grief truly helps us. It’s good and healthy to absorb and process the emotions of loss, to feel the pain, bitterness, sadness, and disappointment. The weight of all these emotions shows how much we valued what was lost.

However, there comes a time when we have to continue with life. Bills still need to be paid, groceries still need to be bought, clothes still need to be cleaned, and gardens still need to be tended. We are allowed to sit in our feelings for as long as it takes to process the loss, but remember that feelings and memories are something we take with us everywhere we go.

We never truly finish grieving someone or something, and that’s a beautiful thing. Gradually, our emotions will balance enough for us to do what we need to, and we will continue with our daily routine and do the mundane things that need to be done. Grief teaches us how to carry the memory of someone with us, like a locket on our chest reassuring us that their memory is always with us.

If you are dealing with grief in Stone Oak, Texas or would simply like to share your thoughts and questions with someone who cares to listen, you might want to meet with a counselor in Stone Oak. Counseling is a great way to care for your mental health no matter what you are facing in life. Contact us by phone or email at Stone Oak Christian Counseling in Texas for more information.

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