What are cognitive distortions? Everyone uses cognitive distortions at some time while trying to make sense of life events. Cognitive distortions are known by other names such as faulty thinking, mistaken beliefs, core beliefs, and thinking errors. Cognitive distortions are a person’s misinterpreted perceptions that support their personal belief system about themselves, others, and the world around them. In Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), a personal belief system is a deep-lying acceptance of ideas that are usually rooted in a [...]
Are you codependent? If you have any of the following traits, you may be struggling with codependency. Excessively relying on and prioritizing the needs, emotions, and well-being of others over your own Feeling the need to “fix” others Enabling other people, even when they do hurtful things to you or others you care about Depending on others too much for your own emotional needs Being afraid to stand up for yourself Inability to set healthy boundaries with others Having [...]
Knowing how to create healthy boundaries is as important as recognizing the need for those boundaries in the first place. Boundaries are the foundation of healthy relationships that guarantee both parties’ needs, wants, and safety are ensured. They provide rules of order and a blueprint that the relationship should be built from. Galatians 6:5 (NIV) says, “For each one should carry their own load.” Boundaries establish respect, care, and security, as well as prevent dependency, unfair dynamics, and toxicity. [...]
One of the more challenging ideas to understand in the Christian faith is the concept of freedom. The apostle Paul wrote that, “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.” (Galatians 5:1, NIV) This freedom is from sin and from the behaviors, attitudes, and mindsets rooted in it. Codependent behavior is one set of patterns that many people need freedom from. [...]
Have you ever truly loved someone and given of yourself for their well-being? It might have been Plato or Shakespeare who said something about love being a sort of madness, and that has a ring of truth to it. Love, however, doesn’t have to be self-destructive or uninformed. It certainly doesn’t need to be codependent to qualify as love, and that’s one reason why knowing the signs of codependency can help you show love well. Several signs of codependency will [...]
Recovering from codependency is possible, but it’s not always easy. We remain locked into codependent relationships for many reasons, even when we know how they are damaging us. Being so closely tangled up with another person who relies on us, and on whom we can rely, is like having dopamine on tap. We have quick access to a feel-good emotional drug, and that can be addictive. The term “codependency” was first used in the context of Alcoholics Anonymous to [...]
Communication is a skill that all humans need to navigate life and relationships. There are conditions in our lives that can hijack our communication and hold us hostage to a mindset that disrupts connection instead of facilitating it. We see this when exploring the nature of codependency. Codependency is the state of being mutually reliant. For example, a relationship between two individuals who are emotionally dependent on one another. Codependent relationships are often characterized by dysfunction in which one [...]
Overcoming codependency is a complex process, but there is help available. One of the best things you can do if you are trying to navigate codependent relationships is to lean on biblical wisdom. This will help you make healthy choices such as relying on God, connecting with a Christian counselor, and setting healthy boundaries that honor the unique person God designed you to be. It is always advised to develop a support network to help you overcome issues like [...]
