Signs Your Spouse is Cheating: A Change in Social Behavior

Most couples marry with the idea that they will be together forever. Unfortunately, for roughly half of those couples, their lifelong commitment will end in divorce. While there are many reasons a marriage might end, and frankly most divorces are a culmination of several factors, infidelity is sometimes the final blow to the “happily ever after.”

One of the more difficult aspects of infidelity is the secrecy and uncertainty that it includes. It’s not like your spouse is likely to tell you that they’re cheating blatantly. If you suspect your spouse is being unfaithful, you may feel more like a private investigator than a loving spouse, looking for clues and analyzing their every move. You can look for signs your spouse is cheating.

There are likely to be several signs that you will see if your spouse is truly cheating on you. But one common sign that presents itself in most cases of infidelity is a shift in social behavior by the cheating spouse. Here are a few signs you might notice if your spouse is cheating on you.

New Friend Group: Just as when someone is single, new romantic relationships sometimes come with a set of new friends. If your partner is becoming socially closer to another person, they might be introduced to that person’s social inner circle, family, neighbors, or co-workers.

Shift in Social Media Behavior: A cheating spouse is likely to change their social media behavior. They may add a new, more alluring profile photo if they are trying to impress someone online. Or they may remove their photo altogether, trying to create more anonymity.

You may find that they have changed their social media passwords, started deleting conversations, or limiting the audience on their posts. Any radical shift in social media usage could be a sign of infidelity.

More Time Away From Home: Working long hours, spending more time with friends, or suddenly taking longer to complete errands can all point to a possible affair. Take note if your spouse is suddenly spending a significant amount of time outside of the home and away from you.

More Emphasis on Social Status: Most people in new romantic relationships want to impress their new interest. Sometimes this takes on the form of improving their physical appearance and other times it might mean creating a more polished social image. If your spouse is suddenly wearing designer clothes or maintaining the cleanliness of their vehicle, you may want to investigate why they have shifted in their behavior.

Awkwardness in Certain Social Groups: Most couples have mutual friends and if you have noticed that your spouse is suddenly awkward or tries to avoid these connections, it could be a sign of infidelity.

Maybe your spouse confided in one of their friends or they are worried that someone close to them might be suspicious of their affair. Secrecy has a better chance of survival when fewer people are involved, so your spouse may likely want to distance themselves from people they think know them best.

Distancing From Moral Role Model: When someone is doing something that they know is wrong, they will often distance themselves from those they look up to. Being in the presence of someone who is a moral role model might make your cheating spouse feel guilty, as they may be reminded of their wrongdoings. Or they may not want to have their role model witness their mistakes for fear of letting this person down.

Notice and Address Signs Your Spouse Is Cheating

Of course, these behavioral shifts are not concrete evidence that your spouse is cheating. Changes in health (both physical and mental), occupation, and social status can all contribute to these same behavioral changes. But if you notice your spouse exhibiting these signs, it might be time to have a heartfelt, transparent conversation.

Being cheated on by your spouse is one of the most heart-wrenching types of betrayal you will ever experience. When “forever” doesn’t happen, it’s natural to feel betrayed and insecure, angry and hopeless. But keep in mind, even though humans are frail and faulty, God will never go back on His promise.

He will never leave you, nor forsake you. Amid your trials, your God is there with you to wipe away your tears, comfort your lonely heart, show grace, and offer wisdom. Reach out to the One who keeps His promises, even when all others fail.

If you feel overwhelmed by the natural feelings that result from a cheating spouse, it might be time to seek professional help from a trained therapist. While individual therapy will help you deal with your emotions and some of the issues in your marriage, marital counseling can make an even larger impact. Call our office today to begin meeting with a professional marriage counselor who can help.