Everyone struggles with anger. But when it starts to negatively impact relationships with people you love, it may be time to see an anger therapist. Although therapy does not carry the same stigma it once did, a person who is struggling with anger may not feel the need to see a therapist. After all, everyone gets angry and expresses it from time to time.
But suppose the angry person is exploding at inappropriate times, and it is causing them to become violent, withdrawn, or exhibit other actions that are taking a toll on the mental and physical well-being of those around them. In that case, it may be time to see an anger therapist.
3 Reasons You May Need to See an Anger Therapist
There are three reasons this may be appropriate:
1. The anger is alienating loved ones
Even the most ordinary person may have issues with loved ones. Relationships can be challenging, but they can be tough to navigate if a person’s anger is boiling over and negatively impacting that relationship. This can cause the victims to alienate themselves or isolate themselves from the angry individual.
Victims may or may not express why they are withdrawing from the relationship. If the victims do express that it is negatively impacting their relationship, they may need a therapist to help them process the issue and brainstorm positive ways to resolve it.
It’s important for someone to resolve the anger, not just to stuff it, but to resolve it for good. A person who suppresses it because they don’t know how to deal with it appropriately may find that it pops up at different times in their lives, often in inappropriate moments.
A future event may trigger the anger attached to a particular trauma or difficult situation. That future event is a reminder of the past pain or trauma that has gone unprocessed. In that case the person must know what to do when feeling triggered so that anger is not how the person reacts to the event.
2. Victims of the anger are becoming fearful
If the victim of a person’s anger is feeling unsafe or that the angry person may snap at any moment, it’s time for the person to get help. The therapist can indicate when the angry person’s emotions are becoming too difficult to control.
For example, suppose a person discusses a dramatic or painful event in a therapy session. The angry person is out of control and is beginning to yell, raise their voice, or get too passionate about the situation.
In that case, the therapist can point out what their tone and gestures are communicating to others. A therapist can also stop the session and help them brainstorm ways in which the angry person does not use that as their default reaction to a person who is making them angry.
There needs to be zero tolerance for any violent behavior or threats of violence. It is not acceptable for an angry person to threaten or inflict violence on another person. If the person feels the need to inflict violence, professional help will be the perfect place for them to resolve their anger and not allow another person to be victimized by that negative emotion.
3. The angry person feels out of control
The angry person doesn’t always know when their anger is getting out of control. However, if they do feel out of control of their emotions or feel as if they may do something harsh out of reaction to that anger, they may need help.
Angry people must be able to express how they’re feeling in a safe environment. The therapist’s office is an excellent place for angry people to express themselves without feeling condemned or that their feelings are invalid. An angry person needs a therapist to help them discover the deeper roots behind the anger.
For example, if a person is feeling triggered by a spouse because they have anger against a mother who abandoned them at a young age, it is essential to see the connection between the two. The abandonment issue may have caused pain, grief, or sadness that is going unprocessed. An angry person may feel resentment or anger toward their mother.
If they have never had the opportunity to confront their mother and express themselves, or if they have done so and the mother has denied the behavior, it may trigger further pain and anger, which then gets projected onto the spouse.
Both spouses can get help from the therapist to determine how the angry person can control their anger and how the other spouse can improve their communication so that anger is not triggered.
Christian Counseling for Anger in Stone Oak, Texas
There’s no shame in getting help for anger. An anger therapist in Stone Oak, Texas may be the best advocate not only to help the angry person resolve their anger, but also for the victims to regain their voice and not allow themselves to be victimized any further. If you and your loved ones need help dealing with anger, contact our office at Stone Oak Christian Counseling in Texas to schedule an appointment with one of the therapists in Stone Oak.
Photo:
“Dry Weeds”, Courtesy of Annie Spratt, Unsplash.com, Unsplash+ License
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Michelle Lazurek: Author
Michelle S. Lazurek is a multi-genre award winning author, speaker, pastor's wife and mother. She is a regular contributor for ibelieve.com and crosswalk.com and is a movie review...
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